by most of them will tell you Raising Cane’s right here in Allston, and the ones that don’t are probably being conscious of their consistently long lines. It’s a unique spot both in name and location- of their ~311
restaurants, this is the only one north of Ohio, which by contrast has 8. (For
those curious about the name, I urge you to dismiss that curiosity. I’ve read
the whole story and it kind of explains it but not really.)
they sell chicken tenders- only chicken tenders, aside from coleslaw, fries, and
texas toast. (OK, technically, they have a chicken sandwich where they put the
tenders on a bun with lettuce and sauce.) But how, exactly, does that business
model thrive in 2017- a time when dietary restricted consumers are catered to
at almost every major restaurant? Since I’m no businessman, I’ll go with Occam’s
razor; they just sell really tasty chicken tenders.
reviewer- order any combo and that’s it, really. The combos are all 2, 3, 4, or
6 pc fingers with sauce, coleslaw, fries, Texas toast and a fountain drink.
DOG BUN WITHOUT THE SPLIT IN THE MIDDLE. A FARCE! I am truly outraged for the
entire state of Texas (by the way, I’ve lived in New England my entire
life and spent a grand total of maybe 4 hours in Texas during layovers). But how
exactly does this qualify as Texas toast?! Look, someone really needs to
explain this to me. Either Raising Cane’s needs to rename this menu item or I’m
going into every bread isle in America, crossing out “Hot Dog Buns” on every
package, and writing “Pre-Texas Toast” on all of them. That’s not how I want to
spend the rest of this life. That would be quite silly. A petition would
probably be more effective.
But what makes this even more mind-boggling, Texas boasts OVER
100 RAISING CANE’S LOCATIONS! How do these proud, strong, hard-working
Americans allow this sham, this caricature to bear the name of their great
state?! Again, I’m no Texpert, but if I ordered a Texas toast in Texas somebody
damn well be handing me a fried loaf of bread! And I WILL SALUTE THEM.
And here’s a funnier .gif from the days of myspace that’s also Texas related!
Both items are in fact so average, for every character I’ve typed after that
first sentence I become more and more indifferent to reality itself. If I
continue to go on about them for even a few sentences more, I may disappear
into the fabric of reality as though I’ve never existed. I’ve actually had to
type this last bit with my knuckles, as my fingers have become ghostly and are
passing right through the keyboard.
fingers appear to have returned to normal. But I’ll tell you whose still got abnormal
fingers- RAISING CANE’S! In fact, they’re paranormally delicious!
typing about the sides.)
close-by, I really see no reason to order chicken fingers anywhere else- unless
maybe I’ve developed a wicked drug habit and only have enough spare change to
order something off a kid’s menu somewhere.
But, hey, who needs drugs when I
have yet to introduce the REAL BULL OF THE RAISING CANE’S RODEO- ITS THE CANE’S
SAUCE!
now I don’t play when it comes to quality condiments. And if you haven’t, and
you don’t know my affection for condiments (which I affectionately abbreviate
to condims): last night for dinner I had ketchup, mayonnaise, and relish with a
side of hamburger. For real, son. I do that sometimes. One might say i’m condim cray!
But rightly so, when it comes to this Cane’s Sauce. It is a
real chicken dipping masterpiece. And the folks at Raising Cane’s know it too- that’s
why the RECIPE IS A SECRET! That’s right, a secret condiment recipe- who could even
fathom such a thing?!
“Cane’s Sauce is tangy with a little bit of spice and full of flavor. We use our own proprietary blend of premium seasonings and spices in our Sauce and our Restaurant General Managers make a new batch every day in each Raising Cane’s kitchen. Our Sauce recipe is top secret and known only by our General Managers, who are sworn to secrecy (so don’t even ask).” -www.raisingcanes.com
So to wrap up this ramble: Raising Cane’s. Weird name, great chicken, awesome sauce, don’t expect anything from the sides. Altogether: a B+ joint for a quick meal, if you like chicken fingers. I’m also factoring in that the entire menu compromises of six items. Although that makes ordering easy, it makes the decision to actually go to RC’s a tough one, when you can get way more variety almost anywhere else.
Oh yeah I almost forgot- the drink. Might as well review the entire menu, right? Well, those Texas folks will be highly disappointed to know there’s no Big Red here- only Pepsi products. Blech. COKE IS IT!
Review by sl33zy
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